Why you need to be 100% dedicated and completely flexible in your business!

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After 6+ years of being a business owner one thing I know for sure is to be successful you need to be completely dedicated to your vision, your goals, your mission- and also totally flexible in how you execute and how you receive what you want. Tricky, no?

For the last 2 (and a bit) years I've been dedicated to coaching and speaking to artists and helping them set up businesses and feel confident running them. I built free communities online and offline for artists, I held events, I spoke at art schools and art organizations. I was 100% dedicated to artists. I literally turned down people that came to me and said "Can I work with you?" if they weren't specifically artists, and preferably visual artists.

But my mission is bigger than serving just artists, because it's become clear to me that limiting myself to only that audience, limits the impact I can have, and limits the amount of people who can work with me to receive EXACTLY what it is they really need. And that's the thing, we start businesses and we can get stuck too much on us, rather than what our (potential) clients and customers need. So after deciding to open up my coaching services to other kinds of entrepreneurs, I'm still 100% dedicated to helping thoughtful, creative people achieve their ideal life by doing what they love.(You can check out my revamped offers of support here.) And I'm practicing being flexible around how it happens moving forward! 

If you look at your own business, can you see some ways you may be blocking yourself from doing what you want or limiting the kind of impact you can have? Maybe dedication is looking more like stubbornness. (Aries here so I know about that!) Going into this new year how can you expand your vision of your business to allow more in- whether it's more clients, more sales, more money, more fun- what can you become more flexible with to see the changes happen? 

And if you're not feeling 100% dedicated to what you do, examine the root of that feeling. Is it coming from fear of it not working out? Are you doing more "shoulds" than you need to and working for someone else's dream? What would you need to feel completely dedicated to your work? Maybe it's a sense of security, maybe it's more support. Let yourself create and curate what it is you truly need in your life. 

Contracting to Expand

Before a woman gives birth she has contractions. Before she can be how she needs to be to give birth there is pain. And then there is expansion and the baby is born. And there is light and love and the pain is no longer the focus.

And when we're going through a period of contraction in our life, it can seem painful and prolonged and like it came out of nowhere. But what I'm coming to learn is that it means you are actually preparing to birth something new, to change on a physical, spiritual, mental, emotional level. But it's tough when you don't know what is on the other side of this pain, of this temporary darkness, of this internal struggle. 

Right now I'm in a period of contraction. I'm going inward, and it's not a comfortable feeling. I want to continue on my way, the way I had been- but there is a strong pull saying NO. No to pushing hard, it's not that time, no to putting yourself too far out there, no to overworking, no to stress, no to busy, no to everything I've been holding onto so tightly that I've stunted my own growth. 

What can we do while we go through this tunnel? If I could fly to Bali and relax by the beach, meditate, read for days and not deal with anything I would. (And drink out of coconuts, I love that.) But most of us still have responsibilities and things we can't just put on hold. 

So try this: Remove the excess in your life and allow space for this experience. Take a break from social media, say no to dealing with people who drain you, do only the necessary work, listen to your body and allow yourself the time to just BE. That might mean crying, that might be watching movie after movie, that might mean taking a walk every day when you normally run. Just give yourself the space to choose in the moment what feels best. 

All you need to do is be you. Focus on finding joy. Focus on what brings you to life. Find the fun. Release the guilt of not doing more right now. Be okay with feeling like a hot mess crazy person for a bit. And keep looking forward to that moment when you see the opening, the expansion, the light at the end of the tunnel zooming towards you, and get excited for your next chapter. 

Are Distractions Taking Over Your Life?

Focus, focus...Ok why am I lying on the ground again?!

Focus, focus...Ok why am I lying on the ground again?!

Right now I am writing this blog even though I decided I was going to do yoga and meditate. Why? Because 1. I haven't written a post in months (better start again RIGHT NOW!) and 2. Distractions are easier to focus on than the stuff we have to do and even the stuff we actually say are our priorities. It's not necessarily more fun/fulfilling but it is EASIER, most likely because it's right in front of us (hello phone!) or it's been brought to us by someone else, therefore we don't really need to do anything or take action. (For instance my laptop was next to me and my yoga mat is at least 4 ft. away, hence why I'm here not there.) 

If you made a list of the top 5 things in your life you'd like to focus on and do every day or every week, it would look really simple. Nice and easy, just 5 things that are truly important and meaningful to you. Ahhh, what a beautiful life that would be!

Then cue the distractions. Unfortunately, we are so bombarded these days with not only the stuff we have to do, but all the stuff everyone else is doing. And we just want to eat up all those Instagram posts and click all the article links on Facebook! Honestly, if you think about how much of your day is spent on distractions or things that aren't on your Top 5 Important Stuff list, or even necessary to you getting through and having a good day, it's nuts! At least it is for me, but I'm going to hope you're in the same boat so I don't feel bad about it. 

And the thing is- I get a lot done. Like every day I cross lots of stuff off my to-do list. I can tell you 20 things I accomplished this week. But if I really thought about it I can list way more that I did/listened it/watched/engaged with/stressed over/handled that weren't a priority, or even my responsibility. (I literally just checked my Facebook notification on my computer then looked at my phone and opened Facebook AH!). So distractions are everywhere.  

The other thing about distractions is they keep us away from our emotions. Have you ever gotten so caught up in being busy and just DOING things to avoid really being in touch with and identifying your emotions? It's common and again, easy to do. If you're feeling out of sorts, or just haven't taken time to have a quiet moment to check in with yourself, take it now. What are you ignoring while you're busy playing with the distractions in your life? Are they taking something away from you, like feeling freedom and joy? Maybe you're due for a good cry, let yourself have that, be completely indulgent in taking time to be with yourself. Feel all the feelings. 

So how do you combat distractions from taking over your life? I don't have the answer to this one but I'm really curious how my days and weeks would not just look but FEEL if I consistently denied engaging with distractions. Now I just have to stop writing this blog and get back to what I planned on doing today so I can try that out! 

Tell me how you keep focused on the important stuff and avoid distractions overrunning your life!

Fighting Fear, Finding Lightness

Stress is a pretty constant companion on some level to anyone working a job or running a business. (Or living a life- right?)

And fear is basically a conjoined twin if you're an entrepreneur. So how do people accomplish all these amazing feats all the time when they're accompanied by stress and fear?? How do they even take the first baby step to their big dream?

In my online course (Financial Love for Artists) I work with emerging artists and we take a mindful and loving approach to doing things like opening a business bank account, setting up a pricing structure, and figuring out what the heck they need to do for taxes. And on paper(err...website page) that seems pretty straight forward. And even if you're not an artist there's probably something that's been sitting on your to-do list for many months. So why do so many of us get stuck taking these steps?

Well, we're hanging out with fear and stress. We're buds. BFFs. And we're scared of the "what ifs". What IF my art doesn't sell and I have no money to put in that bank account? What IF nobody wants to hire me for photography? What IF I'm a big freakin' loser and don't make this happen and there is somebody (or many people) waiting to tell me "I told you so" at the end of it? 

It's scary! 

And then again, it's simple. Fear is heavy. It pulls us down, envelopes us and tells us it will keep us safe. Don't make a move, don't take a risk, don't do that thing you really need and WANT to do because WHAT IF?! Better not.

What the brave ones realize, is there is a lightness that comes after pushing past that fear. Once you're on the other side of it you see it wasn't actually that big and scary, but it sure was HEAVY. And that's how people take risks, accomplish things and move up over and over again. They know to reach their goals and get their dreams out of the clouds and into their homes, they must continuously take on fear and pull themselves UP into the light. And it feels good.

Elizabeth Gilbert has a great chapter on dealing with fear and creativity in her book Big Magic.

"It isn't always comfortable or easy- carrying your fear around with you on your great and ambitious road trip, I mean- but it's always worth it, because if you can't learn to travel comfortably alongside your fear, then you'll never be able to go anywhere interesting or do anything interesting." 

It's true, and you don't want to be the most boring person ever, right?! So no, you don't have to try to banish all fears, or pretend you're a total enlightened psycho and have no fears. You just have to know that on the other side of the fear is a lovely clarity and lightness. The lightness comes from not only doing something you didn't think might be possible for you(big pat on the back), but you are continuing on YOUR path. It's not a perfect path. Scooting up, over, and around one fear doesn't mean more won't pop up. It doesn't mean you won't make mistakes. But it does mean you're pursuing what you want. You're taking action. You're BEING who you're meant to be. And that feeling is completely light.  

Peace, love & pixels,

Sonya